"But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
"Too full for sound or foam,
"When that which drew from out the boundless deep
"Turns again home."
- Tennyson
- who read my lines
- and said
- "my, my, you want it all!!" -
that is not it at all
you did not see
what I could not shew ....
insofar (superficially)
as i want it all
childlike, demanding
living rich vitality
sensation and experience
see
how full my life
how richly enjoyed
that is not it at all
my sad complaint
was quite other
of simpler significance
and more complex:
enduring the risen tide
of a disordered heart
caught
in strange undertows
of fancy and desire
wanting
and failing to want
certain
ordinary
commonplace things
of life
may I not ask -
how long?
13th November 1990